Why Work? Sue your way to financial freedom!

---by Micheal

The latest wave of suits brought against companies smacks more of piracy and brigandism than anything resembling legal justice. All you have to do is become financially successful, gain some public notoriety and BLAMO, you can expect to get sued by someone, for something -- no matter how inane -- in hopes of forcing you to provide them with a hefty windfall.

Dan Brown makes tons of money off his book. A couple of less successful authors sue him trying to get a chunk of it for themselves.

Apple makes millions off its iPod. Failed rivals sue on trumped up patent infringement cases, trying to get a chunk of the millions for themselves.

MySpace.com makes millions with its social networking gimmick. A mother sues MySpace because her daughter was assulted by a 19-year old MySpace user.

These are just three recent examples, but the list is long. The lesson is clear. Don't waste your time working for a living, just wait for someone else to amass a pile of coins, then try to snatch some away.

It reminds me of two pirate or brigand stories from history. First are the more famous Pirates of the Caribbean. The lesser known are the robbers along the Natchez Trace.

Pirates: Rather than work hard for pay, (or build, or invest, or whatever) some greedy but lazy folk in the 16 and 1700s had figured out an easier way for a buck. Instead of working, they would lay in wait behind small Caribbean islands. They waited for the treasure ships bound for Spain. That old Hollywood nonsense about pirate ships sailing the open seas for ships to rob was, well, nonsense. That was too much work, for too little prospect of success. Instead, the REAL pirates just sat and waited for the loaded treasure ships to sail by. THEN they would row out quickly and take them by force. Why work? Just wait for someone ELSE to scrape together a pile, then steal it from them.

Robbers: In the early 1800s, Natchez Mississippi was a commerce port. It's on the Mississippi river, just north of the Louisiana line. Boats would bring trade, goods, people, cash, up the river from New Orleans and the gulf. Rather than continue up the river, many goods, people and cash traveled inland, through Nashville, to the Ohio and Cumberland rivers. That wilderness road was called the Natchez Trace. Much like the lazy pirates of the Caribbean, robbers along the Trace knew that money and goods were going to be coming along, so they would just sit and wait to ambush the travelers. Why work? Let someone ELSE make the stuff, or earn the cash, then steal it from them.

All these fluffy lawsuits smack too much of modern-era piracy. Ever notice that no one sues a struggling company or poor sot? Caribbean pirates didn't attack west-bound ships. They were empty. East-bound ships usually had gold bound for Spain.

Perhaps what our court system needs is a legal equivalent of the US Navy. In the late 1700s and early 1800s, the (few) warships of the US Navy patrolled Caribbean waters looking for pirates. They fought and killed quite a few. We need a modern lawsuit pirate buster to roam the courtrooms and blast those who are bringing bogus suits in an effort to take a stash from a wealthy victim. (not that the wealthy are only victims, some of them need busting too)

Maybe then, we can get Americans back to work -- doing something constructive -- and not just laying in wait to steal what someone else has produced.